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Why does he keep texting but not ask me out?
Dating / 10:03 AM - Monday November 29, 2010

Why does he keep texting but not ask me out?

I met a man several weeks ago. We had two dates within the first week and I thought we had a great connection. We did not have sex. He knows I am interested and would like to see him again. He has continued to text and e-mail me, sometimes several times a day, yet says he has been too busy to go out. He said he was sorry and "promises" he will ask me out soon. He is recently separated and has 2 young children and I understand he is going through a lot. However, it's been over a month since I have seen him. I don;t know if he is sincere or just stringing me along. I'm very confused! Any feedback would be appreciated.

- Asked by Female, 46-55, Boston

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He's a chode with no "game".

- Response by chesterdad, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, San Francisco

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Best case scenario - He really is super busy now. Maybe with work, family situation, etc.

Worse case scenario - He is just keeping you in his back pocket. He does not have a strong interest. He might be dating someone else now or playing the field.

- Response by mld1221, A Career Man, Male, Who Cares?, Los Angeles, Managerial

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I understand that you are interested and would like to see him again, but if I were you, I would take things slowly with him. He is recently separated, and is still actually married. He most likely needs some time to adjust to being separated, and may not want to rush into another relationship. I would keep busy living the single life and if he asks you out again, great. If not, then move on! As I said before, many men who are recently separated aren't in a hurry to get into a new new relationship with someone, especially since they are still married. They enjoy dating many women and aren't ready to settle down again quickly. In my opinion, dating a separated man is just asking for heartache/trouble. I think that it is better to wait until he is divorced before you start getting involved with him.

- Response by iamboo2, Female, 46-55, Charlotte, Therapist

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Men often have a date or two while checking out a woman we met. We may even bang her once or twice just to get acquainted. But after getting to know her better it often turns out that we just aren't that interested. She's not the style we are looking for. She's not "wrong" or "bad," just "not my style."

Sounds like he checked you out, got better acquainted, and found that it doesn't work for him.


- Response by greenwind, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 56-65, Construction

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Is it possible he's not really separated, but still with the wife? I would all of a sudden become busy yourself. Really, if he wanted to see you - he would have.

- Response by artsygirl89, Female, 29-35

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If you don't mind me being honest here; it sounds to me as if he has lost interest because there has been no sex yet.
I know speaking from experience, when I seperating, I missed the sex and love making we shared when everything was good but once the split happens, the urges still progress. He may be texting and calling saying he wants to see you but nothing ever transpires. Can he always be busy?? Being sepereated, I knew that I could not be that busy all the time.
My guess would be that because nothing had traspired between the 2 of you within the first 2 dates, he is looking elsewhere.
Hope this helped

- Response by stockinglvr, An Intellectual Guy, Male, 46-55, Boston, Other Profession

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